Whitman Wire

Guide for titling your unnamed off-campus house

Lee Thomas, Can I crash at yours for a few days? April 7, 2022

Sophomores, on-campus juniors, first-years who got away with lying about their age, the time is nearing for you to move out of Papa Whitman's house and into your own abode. Some of you will be graced to...

Illustration by Kimberly Auran.

Make Your Own Humor Article!

Conor Bartol, A(n) [adjective] [noun] April 7, 2022

Whitman College was shocked today by news of a(n) (adjective) ________ scandal involving a(n) (adjective) _________ (noun) _________. (your favorite professor)__________, (adjective)________ member...

Illustration by Kai Bowen.

Student orders 4lbs of bees to Reid post office

Grace Canny, dutiful roommate to Alissa Berman April 7, 2022

Early Wednesday morning, while all of campus slept, a detectable hum was in the air. Not a single bird dared chirp nor a duck dare quack. Whitman was nearly silent except for one building: Reid Campus...

House of former RAs build too much community

Grace Jackson, News Editor April 7, 2022

When 6 former Residents Assistants (RAs) moved into 6969 Valencia St—or the Hague—they were all excited to get away from the first-years. “We’d all been working so hard on programs that no one...

Illustration by Astrid Ketcham.

Bridgerton season 2 review

Carmel Stephan, Peasant April 7, 2022

I’ll be perfectly honest with you: I didn’t finish the first season of Netflix's hottest Regency-Era romance series, but this isn't to say that I don’t know my shit. I knew Bridgerton wasn’t...

“Chalk Writings: An American Musical”

Ben Kearney, Not your chalk V-Nord, but keep up the good work! November 4, 2021

Lin Manuel Miranda has done it again folks, he’s written another goddamn musical. And this time, he’s promising it’s the best thing since sliced bread.  Written in a back-breaking 69 hours, “Chalk...

Illustration by Eli Rodriguez.

Stop stressing about midterms: Failing is just performance art

Carmel Stephan, Has never been out of Character November 4, 2021

Students all around campus have taken to calling their failed midterms ‘performance art.’ As a great connoisseur of the absurd and abstract (see my 10th grade short film commenting on Neo-Dadaism)...

Illustration by Paloma Link.

A dream crushed: I jumped into this pile of leaves and I can’t escape

Conor Bartol, This is my farewell November 4, 2021

Dearest Readers and Legions of Adoring Fans, I’m afraid this will be my final article for the Wire. I regret to inform you that, earlier today, in an attempt to recapture the bygone whimsy of...

Illustration by Shasta Soles.

Using my status as a Wire humor writer for Tinder clout: a true experiment

Sammy Fitts, Feminist But In The Way Men Think It Means November 4, 2021

As a Wire funny girl, I make the reader, that’s you, release a haha or maybe a hehe. I do this by telling fictitious jaunts through the recesses of my concerning mind, usually about monster fucking....

Photo by Samarah Uribe.

Harper Joy’s “A King Lear” brings mixed media, innovation to Shakespearean text

Michelle Foster, Staff Writer March 9, 2017

The traditional and rich language of Shakespeare, combined with modern forms of mixed media, filled the stage in Harper Joy Theatre’s production of “A King Lear.” The play, performed first for Encounters...

This From Cloudland opens at Harper Joy

This From Cloudland opens at Harper Joy

Michelle Foster, Staff Writer October 20, 2016

A boy’s head is stuck in a bear’s mouth, people speak of stealing free things and two lovers hold themselves hostage in “This From Cloudland,” an original piece written and directed by Whitman...

Whitman Events Board Shapes Student Programming

Georgia Lyon March 10, 2016
Whitman Events Board (WEB) is the student-run group in charge of programming on campus.
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issue 7