Conor Bartol, Old-timey Carnival Barker
• March 4, 2021
A student has been confined to bed rest after eating the same meal every day since they arrived to campus. This student had been eating nothing but the Smash Burgers available at Cleveland Commons, a meal...
It is said that the feet of the haute bourgeoisie are the quickest to walk towards revolution. But what exactly adorns these feet when they tramp around Whitman campus? This question lies in the heart...
Cade Schott, Journalist and just the right amount of teeth
• March 4, 2021
News that Anderson Hall was in lockdown sent a wave of apprehension over campus. However, the news was likely the scariest for Fryan Inerk, a sophomore economics major, who slithered into the dorm for...
Canvas has been a part of technology at Whitman for some time now, but with the recent overwhelming necessity for online courses and submission methods, interaction with Canvas has increased exponentially....
Cade Schott, Journalist and front of the horse costume
• February 25, 2021
Walla Walla has turned into a Winter Wonderland receiving several feet of snow in the past week. Many Whitman students took to their front lawns and engaged in the delightful task of building a snowman....
Conor Bartol, Oatmeal Enthusiast
• February 25, 2021
Following last week’s quarantine of Anderson Hall, some enterprising Whitman students have attempted to turn a profit by creating an underground gambling ring based on residence hall lockdowns.
The...
Rachel Husband, Too Tired to Title Myself
• February 25, 2021
In the college’s efforts to follow COVID-19 protocol and open campus safely, they neglected to actually orient first year students to campus. A lot was going on for the college, what with the pandemic...
Dentists are overwhelmed by the influx of patients complaining of teeth hailing from their mouths like COVID-19-laden droplets. A national survey conducted this month exposes a correlation between mask...
Back when we were reasonably fearful of Corona, freshman and sophomores alike rushed home, attempting to flee the dreaded illness. Now, these same students have flocked back to Whitman — and back to...
Conor Bartol, Fastest Pun in the West
• February 18, 2021
While grappling with financial instability, Whitman College is facing criticism for creating a program to make tiny clothes for the ducks in Lakum Duckum.
In a statement released by the College, President...
Sam Huston, shoulder pads are kinda cute
• February 18, 2021
This past Saturday’s student activities fair was a raucous event by any standards, prompting an email from President Kathy Murray. There were a few new faces at the fair, most notably a “Young Republicans...
In the recent Financial Sustainability Review (FSR), the Athletics Department recommended marketing a Whitman Athletics branded wine as a tool for generating revenue. Due to tomfoolery within the administration,...
