
How to gently tell your friend their pornstache sucks
Carmel Stephan, good with feelings
• March 9, 2023
A review of RenFaire’s Murder Mystery
Samantha Fitts, Better than you
• March 9, 2023
5 great tips to keep the ghouls away
Ian Lewis, only a little buzzed
• March 9, 2023

An interview with Ben Shapiro’s cosmetic surgeon
Rachel Husband, in Canada for a boob job
• March 9, 2023
WCTS to hire black magic pest control to fight off my.whitman bug
Lee Thomas, Chrome user with so many fun extensions
• March 9, 2023
Whitman announces new, worse housing to make the rest seem better
Ian Lewis, unsure if North counts as off-campus housing
• March 2, 2023
Jimmy Carter locked in duel with Ronald Reagan’s evil spirit
Rachel Husband, trapped in a bathroom stall
• March 2, 2023

AirPod gremlin found with 196 various collected pods and cases
Lee Thomas, Naked and afraid
• March 2, 2023

Best ways to indicate wealth for spring break
Grace Canny, definitely not compensating for anything
• March 2, 2023

Wēpa gains sentience
Ian Lewis, loyal servant of our printer overlords
• February 23, 2023
Whitman introduces “Human Evil” major concentration
Lee Thomas, Anti-Lee Thomas Advocate
• February 23, 2023
Three easy college meals inspired by CoHo cooks
Grace Canny, this article is dedicated to Paloma Link
• February 23, 2023
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