A lovely surprise that I encountered when I first arrived at Whitman was that they provide complimentary oranges in the dining hall. So sweet, I know! I thought it really showed how much they care about student health.

However, recently, there have been highly concerning allegations coming from the administration regarding the oranges. Apparently, some of the higher-ups claim that the oranges are not free! Some even allege that there has always been a price tag displayed on the table where the oranges are kept. They went as far as to accuse students who take oranges without paying of “stealing.” Very uncool!

Well, I went down to Cleve to hear some student perspectives on these shocking claims, especially about the accusations and the alleged “price tag.”

“Price tag?” one student said. “On the oranges? I’ve never seen anything like that in my life.”

When asked about the accusations of stealing, students held similar sentiments.

“How can I steal an orange? I pay tuition just like everybody else,” one young woman said. “Also, half of the freshmen boys only eat burgers and tater tots from Grill. If you start charging them for oranges, I’m pretty sure they’re all gonna get scurvy.”

An excellent point! How can the administration overlook these pressing public health concerns? Do they care nothing for the health of these young men?

We must take a stand! Take our free printing, fine, but take not our health. If we lie down and let them charge us for oranges, who knows what they’ll do next? Soon, they’ll be telling us we can’t take the plates and silverware from Cleve either! What are we supposed to do, drive all the way to Goodwill to buy a plate? Like we’re made of money?

So, next time you are in Cleve, I urge you to take an orange. If not for yourself, for your fellow student. If we don’t do something, the next thing you know, they’ll be telling us no more free ice cream at Reid, and that is not a world that I want to live in.