Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire
Vol. CLV, Issue 4
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire
All content by CJ Fritz

Student awarded internship grant, will spend summer being burned alive

CJ Fritz, Sk8r Boi
May 3, 2019

ASL translator accused of gang activity

CJ Fritz, Soggy Toast
April 9, 2019
Illustration by Megan Waldau

New couple not as cute as they think

CJ Fritz, Inventor of the Toe Ring
April 7, 2019

Fans outraged as Stuart Little cast in live-action Ratatouille

CJ Fritz, Stale Lollipop
April 3, 2019

Op-Ed: I vaccinated my kid and now he’s a nerd

CJ Fritz, Miss South Dakota Runner Up 1967
February 24, 2019

Big Tobacco begins drowning smokers to lower lung cancer statistic

CJ Fritz, Has a Rock in His Shoe
February 14, 2019
Illustration by Nathaly Perez

Greedy uncle lands dream job in Alumni Fundraising

CJ Fritz, Soggy Broccoli
January 28, 2019

Local bullying firm predicts return of “four-eyes” insult

CJ Fritz, Rapscallion
November 25, 2018
Illustration by Haley King

Shocked congressmen realize Capitol Building looks like a boob

CJ Fritz, Old Bowl of Pasta
November 9, 2018

Mortified vegan accidentally swallows a gnat

CJ Fritz, Kitten Critic
November 1, 2018
Man quits therapy, gets girlfriend instead

Man quits therapy, gets girlfriend instead

CJ Fritz, Mayor of TickleTown
October 19, 2018

Area Man Accidentally Voices Opinion on Israel

CJ Fritz, Notorious Jew
October 12, 2018

BIRKENSTALKER SITUATION NEUTRALIZED

CJ Fritz, Professional Kissing Booth Attendee
October 8, 2018

Adidas customers burning merchandise after latest scandal

CJ Fritz, Three Corns Stacked in a Trenchcoat
September 28, 2018

I Am Part of the Resistance Inside TKE

CJ Fritz, Self-Proclaimed Hero
September 24, 2018

Area dog owners fed up with unpaid labor

CJ Fritz, Amateur Porcupine Hugger
September 23, 2018
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