Commitment issues are spreading through Whitman like an STD, with one situationship after another infecting the campus. It can start from a simple Tinder swipe, a drunken conversation at a party, or...
Glance at your semester bill - past the gym fees you never use because climbing the Hall of Science stairs counts as cardio - and you’ll find the ASWC fees. Ever wonder where all that money goes? Let’s...
You have a crush. Yay! But none of your friends know them. Boo. You really wish you had twin telepathy or some sort of biotechnology that can display an image in your mind to a group. Ok, I guess that...
You may have recently noticed a trend in the styling choices of Whitman students toward tousled bangs, thick wool coats and pointed horns up to three feet in length. Before you try to imitate this...
If buildings could make wishes, the Memorial Building would probably wish that ducks could read analog clock faces. Beyond that, however, it’s difficult to think of anything this glorious edifice...
Whitman’s campus community excels at most woke subjects, with their efforts ranging from showcasing diversity on the covers of their brochures to limiting open discussions in classrooms to prevent politically...
In a groundbreaking announcement that has students and Circle K parking lot dwellers alike buzzing with excitement, Whitman College has revealed its innovative plan to combat soaring tuition costs: converting...
Canadian company Modern Campus (previously known as Presence) has come under increasing scrutiny for the role it plays in collecting student information as a foreign company. However, the real truth...
Hellooooo, sports fans! Are you ready for the latest innovation in throwing objects long distances, maintaining balance on slick surfaces and other feats of athletic prowess? Get ready for the Eraser...
You may have noticed the presence of 20 million copies of The Wire distributed around campus. However, what may have escaped your notice is the transition to fresh editions each week, leaving readers...
Ah, the Undergraduate Conference: a momentous day of rigorous research, academic inquiry, startling results, salient questions and a free lunch. What could be better? The only problem with the Conference...
In yet another scandalous revelation surrounding Greek Life, an anonymous source has disclosed that a fraternity's hazing practices have taken a sinister turn. The new pledges, eager to prove their...
