Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Vol. CLIV, Issue 10
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Board Announces Real World Application Classes

The Academic Affairs Committee of the Board of Trustees announced Thursday that their largest priority for the Fall 2015 semester is to incorporate more courses that are relevant and applicable to college students and provide “Real-World” skills.

Available to all grades, but perhaps most applicable to first-years, will be a lecture on the process of removing yourself from a listserv.

Sophomore Grayson Peterson says that they simply can’t wait for this class.

“Ever since the activities fair, I’ve been getting hundreds of emails a day and it’s ruining my life,” he said. “The offering of this class is far overdue, but I’m glad the board is finally responding to our needs.”

“Sorority Squatting” will be available as a single-credit SSRS class and will be held in Sherwood.

The Rhetoric Studies Department will be adding a class on collaboration ordering pizza toppings as well as one on how to appear educated and cultured while arguing with friends about coffee.

Additionally, a new course offering math credits will advise students with financial help. Professor Jay Smiles will be instructing the class, which will be available to sophomores and juniors.

“Finances are a necessary skill, and frankly I’m appalled at how many young people don’t know even the basics,” said Smiles. “This course will mostly help to avoid over-spending at Hot Poop and how to budget your flex dollars throughout the semester.”

Director of the Outdoor Program Brien Sheedy will be leading an intro-level class on how to adjust Chaco straps.

“It’s so hard,” said an anonymous senior.

Another math class offered is a statistics course on the basics of gambling. The board explains in the issued announcement that students “have to pay back their loans somehow.”

Additionally, Walla Walla community member Arnold Joseph James is leading a 300-level seminar to teach and discuss road-crossing skills. While the class focuses on Boyer Ave., many of the techniques taught can apply to any street.

“I’m very excited about this seminar,” said junior Harrison McCormick. “Whenever I cross the street without looking, the drivers that I make slam on their brakes sometimes honk. I’m so glad that Whitman has decided to teach important and applicable real-world classes. Like, how many times have I used calculus today?”

First-year Jonathan Kopp-Meyers agrees that his education needs more relevancies to his own life. Kopp-Meyers has already spoken to the professor teaching Man Bun Care 110 about securing a spot for him in the class.

“I love that Whitman is allowing us to follow our passions,” he said. “This class goes really in-depth with incorporating hair products and different styles. I’m going to get so many ladies!”

Two new courses will be available in the Fashion Department this fall. The courses offered will cover how to look cool wearing a bike helmet and how to dress in a rugged or casual way without looking like you’re trying too hard.

The last class offered is on the serious side. This lecture will serve as a safe space to discuss the oppression and stigmatism of those who choose to walk the campus barefoot.

“Just because I rock climb doesn’t mean I’m not human,” said sophomore Toni Parker.

Wine Bag-Slapping 110 and Room-Cleaning When Parents Visit 230 are still being discussed as options but may not be offered for financial reasons.

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