Whitman Wire

Animated Whitman Statues Become “Liberal Arts”

Lane Barton April 7, 2016

The term “liberal arts” has a new meaning at Whitman after reports of campus sculptures moving about unrestrained across Ankeny Field during spring break. Although all photographs and video recordings...

Trunk and Supporters Storm Convention

Adam Heyman, Opinion Editor April 1, 2016

Cleveland, Ohio (AP)–On Thursday the 21 of July presidential candidate and business magnate Richard Trunk, known to his most ardent supporters as Dick Trunk, stormed out of the 2016 Republican national...

In The News

April 1, 2016

THIS JUST IN: Parents just really think you should major in BBMB “Honey, your cousin Tim majored in Biology at the U, and he’s in med school now! And remember, there’ll always be sick people in...

Wilderness Expert Explains “Leave No Trace” Skills to Local Dog Walkers

Maggie Baker, Art Director April 1, 2016

Whitman students are going above and beyond to teach wilderness skills in the Walla Walla community. “I go for walks around Walla Walla when I’m not backpacking in the Cascades, so, I guess I come...

Photo by Tywen Kelly

Nukes All Around!

April 1, 2016

The mushroom cloud. It’s glorious, with its distinctive, curled shape and its enormous size. Could there be a better end to the world? During World War II, when nuclear technology was just beginning...

JK Prowling announces “History of Magic in the Middle East”

April 1, 2016

Hairy Plotter fans were stirred into a mad frenzy this week when JK Prowling, author of the popular fiction series, unexpectedly released a series of short articles describing the history of wizards in...

Whitman Welcomes the Awesomely Cool Class of 2020!

Austin Biehl, staff writer April 1, 2016

In the class of 2020, Whitman has once again attracted a homogenous group of down-to-earth, unpretentious, fun-loving, granola-chewing, Birkenstock-wearing, apathetic, White kids. Throughout high school,...

Off Campus Studies Office Announces Mandatory Study Abroad

Olivia Gilbert April 1, 2016

In an effort to create leaders capable of operating in our increasingly interconnected world, the Off-Campus Studies Department announced this past Friday in a formal email a new graduation requirement....

Meme by Tywen Kelly

Interview with the EIC and Publisher

April 1, 2016

Every year at this time, the leaders of Revisionist go on the record about the joys of working for a campus newspaper. This year, we found Editor-in-Chief Sharra Hornet and publisher Maya Kay enjoying...

KWCW Show of the Week: Dance with the Devil

Eric Anderson, Staff Writer April 1, 2016

He may delight in suffering and despair, but even Satan, Lord of Darkness, can sometimes feel weighed down by the pressure of his job. When that happens, the Father of Lies says there is no better relaxation...

Club Disbands After Members Exhaust Dating Options

Martina Pansze April 1, 2016
Following a press release on Tuesday, the Whitman Alpine Luge Team (WALT) will be disbanding indefinitely.

Missed Connections

News Section April 1, 2016

Puking my heart out Where: TEK basement When: Friday, 1:30am You were on the far side of the basement. Our eyes met. I could tell this was something special, and I stumbled my way through the...

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