So you say you’re a Whitman student. You are a diverse student who’s athletic and smart; you probably want to change the world. But as diverse as you are, you’ve probably noticed there’s an uncannily similar student here… Want to fit in? Follow our eight fashion tips:

1. Afraid your pants won’t match the rest of your outfit? Try yoga pants! They go with all occasions – class, gym, dinner, everywhere! (But not the extra sheer ones from Lululemon…)

2. Need shoes that can work on campus and in the Whitman student’s natural habitat (i.e. the wilderness)? Pick out at least one pair of Keens, Chacos or Birkenstocks. That way, everyone can tell that you love the environment and go on a bunch of OP trips.

3. You ought to own at least three flannel shirts- minimum- because in a past life you were a lumberjack. So was your roommate. And your best friend.

4. It’s April and sunny out but your core is still feeling cold. Wear your REI puffy jacket or vest. We cannot stress how important it is to keep your core warm at ALL times. No exceptions.

5. Grow a beard. Forget to shave your legs. Who needs a shower… for the last three weeks? You should look like you were raised in the mountains and dammit, you’re proud! The fact that you’re actually from Seattle or Portland bears no importance.

6. Embrace how anti-establishment you are and make sure to upgrade your wardrobe with random shit from Goodwill. See that shirt with a wolf or a cat? Buy it. Don’t forget to cover up with a Patagonia or North Face jacket––hey, Goodwill doesn’t sell the warmest clothes!

7. You have a cupboard full of cups but you still don’t know what to drink out of? Choose the mason jar. It shows how seriously you take the slogan, “reduce, reuse, recycle” and shows how callused your rock climbing, mountain man paws are. Those jars be hot!

8. Not feeling the Mountain Man look? Grab your skinniest jeans, a cardigan and your RayBans and call it a day. Because being a mainstream Whittie is so uncool.