Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire
Vol. CLVI, Issue 5
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

AJ Johnson, Humor Writer

AJ (she/her) is a freshman, still undecided, who started working as a Humor Writer in 2024. She’s a very serious journalist dedicated to writing the silliest articles imaginable, and hopes to do so for many semesters to come!

All content by AJ Johnson

The Bizarre and Wonderful World of Parody Porn

AJ Johnson, Don’t read this one, mom
March 13, 2025
My Editor Won’t Let Me Write About Ducks

My Editor Won’t Let Me Write About Ducks

AJ Johnson, too busy complaining about her editor to write a byline
March 6, 2025
Outrage! The Paper I Half-Assed Only Got a B+

Outrage! The Paper I Half-Assed Only Got a B+

AJ Johnson, currently cutting nose to spite face
February 27, 2025

Coping with Rejection: My Dad Doesn’t Like My Articles

AJ Johnson, proud middle child to two middle children
February 15, 2025

Christmas in Ye Olde South Dakota

AJ Johnson, the other midwestern princess
February 6, 2025
The Five Freshmen You’ll Meet at Whitman

The Five Freshmen You’ll Meet at Whitman

AJ Johnson, Over the word count
November 21, 2024
Fighting the System for Those Too Chicken to Miss Class

Fighting the System for Those Too Chicken to Miss Class

AJ Johnson, will fight to the end (with many naps in between)
November 14, 2024
Why You Weren’t Invited to the Party

Why You Weren’t Invited to the Party

AJ Johnson, banned from Halloweekend celebrations forever
November 7, 2024
Haikus for the Fall Semester

Haikus for the Fall Semester

AJ Johnson, bad poet, and enemy of much worse poets
October 31, 2024
Ranking of sexiest Looney Tunes characters

Ranking of sexiest Looney Tunes characters

AJ Johnson, Can a duck and a rabbit truly fall in love?
October 10, 2024
An Argument for Lawn Gnomes

An Argument for Lawn Gnomes

AJ Johnson, Is very small and has no money
October 3, 2024
How to Avoid Lymancest

How to Avoid Lymancest

AJ Johnson, Dating three people, all also named ‘AJ’
September 26, 2024
Does Grandma Hate You or are You Just Afraid of Punctuation?

Does Grandma Hate You or are You Just Afraid of Punctuation?

AJ Johnson, New in Town
September 19, 2024
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