The world shifted on Feb. 8, 2022 when the Instagram account @longestfrywhitman reappeared on our feeds. The two year long hiatus was broken by an extra long sweet potato fry, currently ranked at #2. In the following week, submissions to the account began to flood in from eager fry eaters across campus aspiring to be the longest fry. But a rise in participation has stirred an important conversation over fry size.

In years past, submissions were standardized by all laying flat next to the Cleveland provided ketchup bottles to demonstrate scale. This method was clear and easy for followers to visualize. Odd angles, optical illusions, and Adobe Photoshop have complicated the usually simple process. In the face of this movement, some feel the longest fry craze may be setting the standard too high.

For the past 3 nights, Cleveland Common’s infamous Grill has been subject to protestors objecting to the ‘Phenomenization of Long Fries.’ On the condition of anonymity, an activist said “Most fries are not as long as a plastic cup. Or even as long as a Hunt’s 100% Natural Tomato Ketchup bottle. They just aren’t. So why are we expecting them to be?” Despite more frequent submissions, it’s true, it seems most fries are not long enough to compete with fries on the current leaderboard.

Another protestor, who wished to be unnamed but identified as a TKE brother, defended the altered fry photo submissions and argued “I get the pressure, I’ve been there. But the issue isn’t with the fries, it’s about our society’s expectations of fries.”

Whitman’s branch of the Ore Ida-State of Idaho-McDonalds Love Your Fry campaign may have more campus support than originally thought. When asked, a passerby commented, “Yeah, I genuinely think we should celebrate the average size fries more. To me, they are more satisfying. And if you think about it, they’re more economical, because they require less ketchup or garlic aioli when you dip them. They just, like, will always have a better sauce to fry ratio.”

In reality, a fry’s size doesn’t matter, people will continue ordering them at dinner.