“First you want me to join the family read-aloud circle, and now you want me to watch ‘Call the Midwife’ with you and dad!? I’m outta here!!” screamed 21-year-old Melly Snooks to her confused parents on Sunday night. It had taken her parents nearly an hour to solidify their decision to rewatch CTM, due to their indecisive and egalitarian nature. Mrs. Snooks was overheard saying to her husband that she, “really wants to make you [Mr. Snooks] happy, but Game of Thrones is just a little too violent for me [Mrs. Snooks].” So, after a heated debate that barely reached above a normal conversation level, the two landed on “Call the Midwife.” 

For those readers who are unfamiliar with “Call the Midwife,” a short synopsis of the plot is basically a gynecologist version of Grey’s Anatomy. It’s about a bunch of religious middle-class English girls whose only forms of transportation are bikes with wicker baskets. At times, the girls even like to get a little bit naughty by making jokes…As you can tell, the show gets pretty wild. 

Therefore, when Mr. and Mrs. Snooks set out to begin the 9-seasons-long show at season 1, episode 1, their fully grown college student nearly had an actual meltdown. Feeling ostracized from the living room by her parents’ viewing decision, Melly completely retreated upstairs where she blocked out the sounds of squeaky little British voices by watching hours of e-boy TikTok thirst traps.