Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

What to do When You’ve Forgotten Someone’s Name

Clara Wheeler, Humor Writer

November 10, 2016


Filed under Humor

Uh oh. That person sees you again. You know the one, the nice young woman who knows your name but you have absolutely no idea who she is. Where do you know each other from? A shared class? Club activity? One night stand? She smiles at you and greets you by name. “Hey you,” you say before you pass each other...

Me Try Impress Now

Trevor Lewis, staff writer

October 20, 2016


Filed under Humor

  Hello. Me couldn’t help but notice you very pretty lady. You think me pretty too? Me wear ironic button up with tiny schnauzers printed on it. Me lather Axe bodywash to disguise stink flesh smell. Me very, very cool. Maybe you want talk? Me excellent conversationalist. Approachable....

How to Stand Out at Whitman

Megumi Rierson and writer

September 22, 2016


Filed under Humor

Going to Whitman can sometimes feel like going to school in a fishbowl of millennials that all look like various permutations of the same clean-cut, upper class millennial hive mother. Everywhere you look it seems like more and more Birkenstock-clad intellectuals in over-sized jean jackets and Free People bra...

Surviving winter break: tips from a veteran

Austin Biehl, staff writer

January 28, 2016


Filed under Humor

Winter break can be a trying time. Yes, the comforts of home are seductive: consuming meals that aren’t mild laxatives, sleeping in a bed without listening to your roommate snore, and getting to torment your parents just a little are some of my personal favorites. But Winter Break is also four weeks...

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