Chemistry: Moonshine ‘cause you all can make it yourselves.

Biology:  Bloody Mary because it’s like your organisms. It’s got blood and vegetables.  

Astronomy: Galaxy Cocktail. I’ve heard that one of these will knock you out of this world, and if you have two, you might even level up to an astrology major.

Geology: Rolling Rock.  All rocks roll downhill. Just keeping pounding these when you go to work for an oil company.

BBMB: Water. ‘Cause let’s be real, with all the work you folks talk about having you should be studying.

Math: Long Island. There are a lot of variables you have to account for while making this drink but Intro to Higher should give you the skills you need to accomplish the task.

English: T’was a Dark and Stormy night when Herman Melville sat down to write his masterpiece. Keep drinking and one day you all will get there too.

Rhetoric: Sex on the Beach. You all are good at using flowery language to embellish what you’re really saying. Right?

Art: Jello Shots. Hey, when you enjoy playing with colors and shapes who’s to judge. Keep thinking outside the glass.

Music: Beethoven thought a bottle of Brandy was the perfect fifth. Oh the joy!

Film: Martini shaken, not stirred.

Philosophy: Cigarettes, Pinot and if you’re partial, a side of mansplaining.

Religion: Wine. The blood of Christ is some sacredly powerful stuff.

Theater: Shirley Temple. After three of these you too will be able to tap dance like an eight-year-old.

Politics: White Russian. Let’s be honest, the world these days is run by the Russians and white males, so why not have a drink?

Psychology: Mike’s Hard could just be a placebo effect … Now there’s a senior thesis that you could get people to participate in!

Sociology: Cosmopolitan ‘cause it’s what you drink when you’re feeling social.

History: Old Fashioned. Sorry to tell you all this, but you’re stuck in the past.

Economics: Enjoy sipping on some Natty Ice ‘cause it’s the most bang for your buck. Don’t you just love how the market decides these things?

Anthropology: Tequila Shots

Environmental Studies: Gin and Tonic. Have you all given a juniper tree a hug recently?

Gender Studies: Vodka Martini watered down with male tears. Some things have never tasted so sweet.