What are you supposed to do if you get an olive pit hopelessly stuck in your mouth during your boss’ fancy promotional dinner?
“The way you put it in your mouth is the way you take it out!” said Susan Buchanan, Career Center Director and coordinator of the annual Etiquette Dinner. “If it’s an olive and you put it in with your fingers, you take it out with your fingers. If it’s a chicken bone, you take it out with your fork.”
Sixty juniors and seniors gathered in the Reid Ballroom on March 11 to eat a free meal provided by Bon Appetit and to learn about the rules of table manners.
“We’ve been doing this for over ten years, and it’s always been one of the most popular programs we do,” Buchanan said. “The reason why we limit it to juniors and seniors is that we can only accommodate a certain number of people to do this effectively. We want to give everyone a chance to attend, because this is preparation for the real world.”
Senior Nick Littman said he attended the dinner for that reason. “You never know when you might need to know how to sip soup properly from the bottom of the bowl or where to place your silverware when you are finished eating. Small details can matter a lot when trying to make an initial favorable impression,” he said.
According to Heidi Baldwin, Assistant Director of the Career Center and another coordinator of the event, the Etiquette Dinner is meant to be educational but also enjoyable. “We try to make it lighthearted and fun. People laugh a lot and they ask a lot of questions,” she said.
The students fired about a dozen questions during the first course alone. If you accidentally knock salad off your plate, should you pick it up? (Yes, then set it on the side of the plate.) Is it okay to use your finger to nudge food onto your fork? (No, use your knife.) How do you know if it is okay to order alcoholic beverages? (If it is a job interview, it’s probably not advisable.) Is it okay to dip bread in soup? (No.) What about crackers? (Only if they are the small oyster crackers, saltines make too much of a mess when you crush them.)
One important point that Baldwin wanted attendees to take away from the dinner was that it isn’t necessary to stress about being perfect.
“One thing I always tell students is that people overlook accidents. So don’t worry if you drop a roll or spill water. But what people do remember is when you use poor manners,” she said.
The purpose of the dinner overall was to instill confidence in students who are getting ready to leave the comfort of the Reid Cafeteria and enter the big world.
“What we like to say is that we demonstrate good etiquette and you can choose whether or not you want to use those skills in particular situations,” said Buchanan. “Whether it’s a dinner interview, seeing a family friend or meeting a significant other’s parents, it just adds a little bit when people have these skills.”
According to Littman, simple good manners can put you at an instant advantage. “One of the most interesting bits of knowledge I learned was people often judge you based on the first 10 seconds when you walk in the room,” he said. “So if you enter with confidence, dressed nicely, employers or co-workers may be more willing to hear what you have to say and give you the benefit of the doubt.”
In the end, confidence is what it is really about, and the Etiquette Dinner was there to help students find it.
