Stop saying “girl math,” “ girl dinner” and other “girl” trends. It’s not cute to perpetuate stereotypes and feed into the patriarchy. Yesterday, I had a conversation with a friend, she talked about how she was struggling in her Calculus class, and as we were having a pleasant conversation the words “girl math” slipped out of her mouth, and in that moment a grunt of disgust came out of mine.
You can argue that these “girl” sayings are just a trend and that they are not that deep. However, that is exactly what the patriarchy wants. When you say something such as “girl math,” you are actively reinforcing sexist stereotypes that women are bad at math.
Instead, we need to start practicing microfeminisms. Small, everyday actions that fight against the patriarchy. You could start doing simple things such as defaulting to ‘her’ when assuming the gender of a doctor, lawyer or other professions in male-dominated fields, or even better, using labeling like “male doctor” or “male lawyer.” Finally, let’s start walking into rooms and addressing everyone as “ladies and sons of ladies.” The microfeminisms need to be more sly and devious.
For example, I remember I was in class during my Junior year of high school and the guy next to me was watching basketball. It was distracting, so I leaned over to ask what he was watching. He responded “the NBA” and in return I gave him a confused look and responded with “oh, do you mean the MNBA?” He gave me an awkward chuckle and put his headphones back in. Although I was slightly embarrassed at the time, the embarrassment will fade, but that action of microfeminism will stay forever.
I am not alone in this. Microfeminisms have been a growing discussion online as a small act of resistance and it’s worth paying attention to these discussions. Some ideas that have been circulating online that we can start implementing into our daily vocabulary include “mantrum,” “testarical” and “HEmotional” for when men start acting emotionally rash or immature. If a man is staring at you and making you uncomfortable, say “I’m sorry, I don’t have any change.”
Microfeminisms not only frequently get strange responses from men, but often they bring more joy to women’s lives. And that joy is radical. In a society that has demanded women shrink themselves, choosing to take up space and actively fight against these small actions that are long woven into society is powerful.
Another act I have been practicing is catcalling men back. From my experience, Isaacs Ave is filled with disgusting men who will frequently cat call you out the window. At first I changed my running path to avoid Isaacs and not experience these putrid men catcalling me anymore. However, I realized I should not have to adjust my running route because these men have made me uncomfortable. Instead, I realized I needed to make these men uncomfortable.
Quickly after this realization, I began taking my old running route down Isaacs and as expected I was catcalled again. Instead of keeping my head down or whispering vulgar responses to myself, I have started barking back. Reversing the roles is an essential part of this practice. When a man asks you to smile, respond “you first” or even if a man is making you feel uneasy walking down the street, tell him, “you should smile more.”
It’s time to stop succumbing to the patriarchy in the form of foolish trends like “girl dinner” or “girl math.” Let’s start subtly implementing these microfeminisms into our daily lives. The patriarchy wasn’t built in a day, and neither will it be dismantled in one. But through microfeminisms, we slowly fight against it. The next time you hear someone say “girl math,” hit them with a confused look and ask if they mean “male-pattern financial reasoning.” Will they look at you strangely? Probably. But will it be worth it? You do the math.
