Seniors: Do They Give a Crap?

Elena Aragon

As the days dwindle by, bringing the class of 2014 closer and closer to graduation, it’s time to check in with them to see how much of a crap they still give about school.

Economics major Red Loochen: “I’m done with everything. You could say I’ve been chillin’ on the roof frequently, catchin’ some rays. Although I have kind of done that  all four years here.” Give a crap-o-meter: 0

Psychology major Chessia Yawner: “I passed my writtens and finished my thesis, but still have orals to do. So I’m chillin’, but I’m not chiiiillin’.” Give a crap-o-meter: 2

Biophysics, biochemistry and molecular biology major Greta Killmore: “I still have some work on my thesis to do and need to take my orals. Still, I manage to make it to Trivia Tuesday every week, cause come on, people. We are still in college after all.” Give a crap-o-meter: 4

Film & Media Studies major Matt Hesler: “I finished making my senior project, so now I am working on another film for fun. It’s always been about fun.” Give a crap-o-meter: 5

Statistical analysis of this data shows that senioritis has hit the class of 2014 hard. Whether or not they have completed their senior requirements, they can no longer find a crap to give. As each springtime day blooms, so does the apathy of this class. Party on, seniors, and enjoy the last few weeks of the best part of your life. It’s all downhill from here.