Fouls of Instagram

Elena Aragon

Your actual teeth after wisdom teeth surgery: Picture of your face with ice and cheeks looking like a gopher = cute. Picture of your nasty, bloody teeth makes me want to throw up.

Your nails alone: Seriously, how boring. Isn’t the point of painted nails to complement an entire outfit? Just the nails makes it seem like you’re proud that you stayed in the lines. Good job, my 23-year-old compadre.

Mirror selfies: Go back to Myspace, or just gain some self-esteem. Better yet, get yourself a Snapchat.

Homework: Why? That shit ain’t pretty.

Doing transformation Tuesday, throwback Thursday and flashback Friday all in the same week, or any of them more than once a month: We get that you think you were cute when you were a kid. Now stop being so damn conceited. Also, last weekend is not a throwback.

Your own tweet: People didn’t like it on Twitter, why would they like it here? If I wanted to read your thoughts I wouldn’t have followed you on a visual media.

Adding more than 10 tags: Is that even necessary? Are you that desperate for likes? All that time adds up when adding those tags-put that to good use and make friends in real life.

Your newborn baby: It’s wrinkly. At least leave out the placenta. Or surround it with puppies to make it somewhat bearable.

Your friend passed out on the toilet: As funny as that is, it’s just ratchet. No one wants to see those sorts of intimate moments between someone and the porcelain god.

Your feet while lying in the sun: Sunshine is great, don’t get me wrong, but no one wants to see your crusty-ass toes.