Hello, fellow Whitman students. I just wanted to let you know that sometimes you say some weird things. To demonstrate this, I have written down some conversation snippets, word for word, that I have found worthy of publication. (Of course, to ensure that I don’t have people tracking me down and giving me a playful hit on the head with a sledgehammer, I have replaced all the actual names with those of George Bridges and Barbara Maxwell.)
George Bridges –– Yeah, we’ll have to characterize it.
Barbara Maxwell –– I don’t even know what the fuck that means.
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Barbara Maxwell –– It’s been over-generalized as a game where you jump up and down a lot.
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George Bridges –– I’d be willing to work for money.
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George Bridges –– Hillary Clinton is a boss.
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Barbara Maxwell –– Can you guys be mean to her and make fun of her and kick her?
George Bridges –– Why?
Barbara Maxwell –– Because we want her back, obviously.
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Barbara Maxwell –– Oh, I saw my RA in the dining hall; I didn’t say anything, but it was so weird after seeing him naked.
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George Bridges –– That’s really valuable, in the sickest sense of the word.
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George Bridges –– In Mexico there’s a law: If a woman abandons her home, then she loses complete custody of her kids.
Barbara Maxwell –– Awww snap!
