Backpage Interview with Editor-in-Chief

Adam Brayton

The Pioneer is under the wing of a new Editor in Chief, Patricia “Pati” Vanderbilt.   To gain a sense of her vision for the paper, Backpage arranged a special interview with our enigmatic leader.

BP: What grand plans do you have on the table for the paper this year?
PV: I want to hear the sounds of the men working on the chain . . . gaaaaang.
BP: . . .
PV: [glares]
BP: Uh . . . has your study abroad experience in India influenced your views on the journalistic process?
PV: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me.
BP: So, our correspondents tell us that you’re terrified of commitment. Can you confirm or deny this?
PV: I keep your love locked down, love locked down!
BP: Oh . . . okay.   W-would you call yourself the harbinger of a new era?
PV: You ARE the weakest link.   Goodbye!
BP: . . . What?

The interview was halted at this point because Ms. Pati went Full British. Never go Full British.