The flurry of opening week activities and opportunities often leaves first-years completely overwhelmed. This year, however, one first-year was not impressed with the offerings. Dorphoebe Jones spoke to The Pioneer about being greatly underwhelmed by the number of campus groups that were represented at the annual Activities Fair that took place last Monday on Cordiner Side Lawn.

“I have too little to do!” complained Jones. “There are simply not enough clubs and interest groups on campus to keep me occupied. What am I going to do with all of my free time? At my old school, there were billions of activities and I was president of all of them.”

However, Jones failed to mention that she was in fact homeschooled from kindergarten through 12th grade, and that she was president of both the dishwashing and table setting teams, neither of which made it to Nationals. On this point Jones failed to comment.

“I signed up for every listserv. Now I get hundreds of emails every day and I feel like I belong. It’s great!” said fellow first-year Ralphy Ralphson.

Another first-year, Arnold Smithson, stated that he also signed up for many campus activities, but now regrets his decision to do so. He commented that he feels so overwhelmed.

“I cannot possibly commit to all of these things … but I will anyways. I am no one if I don’t overcommit myself,” said Smithson.

In response to all of this, Jones is looking to start a few of her own clubs on campus, including Clean Plate Club, Trash-takers, Recycling Sorting Committee and Floor Sweeping Club.  If anyone is interested in signing up for Floor Sweeping Club, please contact her at [email protected]