Are you wondering what your major translates to in the real world? Maybe you are just regretting having switched out of BBMB into theater. In any case, we’re offering a sampling of what some popular Whitman majors truly mean.
Asian Studies: You are probably Asian.
Biology: You are pre-med and/or uncreative.
Chemistry: You don’t value your afternoons, and you definitely are not getting laid.
Economics: Hustlenomic$
English: A degree to lay down sick beats that flow like a river.
Environmental Studies – _____________: Adding ES to a major means nothing more than the regular major would, you just have to do more (bullshit) work.
Gender Studies: Seriously?
Math: The square root of 69 is 8 somethin’, right? ‘Cause I’ve been tryna work it out, oh!
Philosophy: The only major that really counts.
Race and Ethnic Studies: You are a white girl.
