Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Vol. CLIV, Issue 9
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Illustration by Taylor Penner-Ash

Election 2016: “Daddy, did the mean man make you cry again?”

Trevor Lewis, Staff Writer October 27, 2016

After a brutal day on the campaign trail, an utterly demoralized Mike Pence checked into his hotel room at the Des Moines La Quinta Inn. Sources can confirm that while in the midst of consuming four pints...

Illustration by Eric Rannestad

This Week in Reality TV: Presidential Debate!

James Leroux, staff writer October 5, 2016

This past Monday, Sept. 26, at 6 p.m. Pacific Standard Time, the first of the 2016 Presidential Debates was broadcasted to 84 million people, setting a new record for viewership in presidential debate...

Illustration by Taylor Penner-Ash

The slow decline of Democracy

Cy Burchenal September 22, 2016

As of September 16, Edgar Matobato, an alleged death squad member, levelled allegations against Philippine president Rodrigo Duterte including, but not limited to, murder. This is a mere sliver of...

Trump Manipulates Evangelicals

Sean Hannah, Columnist April 21, 2016
Evangelical Christianity emphasizes love and a mission to spread the word of God, so it is blatantly ironic that Trump’s supporters are so ready to accept his proposed laws that limit Mexican and Muslim Immigration.

Horrified Mitch McConnell Wakes Up From Nightmare in which Trump is the GOP Nominee

Jeffrey Gustaveson, staff writer March 10, 2016

  Washington, D.C. -- Waking in a panicked, cold sweat early Wednesday morning, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell breathed an enormous sigh of relief after reminding himself that his nightmare...

This Week In Politics

Jeffrey Gustaveson, staff writer February 18, 2016

--Nation surprised when reminded that Supreme Court is still a thing --Ted Cruz announces plans to nominate himself to Supreme Court if elected --Anonymous source: Jeb Bush apparently still running...

The Candidate Latinos Want

Jose Coronado, Columnist October 22, 2015

According to Pew Research, 11 percent of the national eligible voters are Latinos. As elections come close, candidates will inevitably try to lure in Latino voters with promises. Bernie Sanders has promised...

Donald Trump Makes Life Harder for Latinos

Jose Coronado, Columnist September 24, 2015

In June, American businessman Donald J. Trump announced he was running for President of the United States. In his announcement speech, he made outrageous remarks about Mexicans: “When Mexico sends its...

Load More Stories