Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Tale of Wolfman College

Tale of Wolfman College

Melina Hughes

October 31, 2013


Filed under Humor

It was a gorgeous 65 degree fall day, a light, crisp breeze ruffling the leaves under the golden autumn sun. A lovely day by all accounts, but that was the day the wolves came to Whitman College... It started slowly, first a wolf was seen smoking behind Olin Hall, a second and third standing in the sandwich line at Prentiss Dining Hal...

Chamber of TKErets Has Been Opened

Melina Hughes

October 20, 2013


Filed under Humor

An unnamed, former Pio sports and Backpage writer, poetry-writing Tau Kappa Epsilon senior agreed to speak to reporters in attempts to dissipate the cloud of mystery surrounding the much-rumored and mysticized Chamber of TKErets. Our unnamed, English and philosophy double major source confirmed the rum...

Haze of the Corn Maze Dayz Craze

Melina Hughes

October 17, 2013


Filed under Humor

What started out as a fun-filled evening quickly turned to tragedy when a group of eager young first-year students attended their first ever haunted corn maze here in the idyllic town of Walla Walla. On a crisp fall evening, a small group of Andersonians, having heard the rumors of the great excitement th...

Mr. Autumn Pageant

Melina Hughes

October 10, 2013


Filed under Humor

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is that time of year again, the time we've all been waiting for: fall. And with the arrival of this glorious season came the 12th annual Mr. Autumn Pageant. This year's four contestants, Scott Flannelman, Adam Sweaterson, Jacob Thermalsocks and Samuel "Grizzly" Bootson, competed...

Who Stole My Seasonal Pies?

Who Stole My Seasonal Pies?

Rosemary Hanson

October 10, 2013


Filed under Humor

I remember it like it was yesterday. There are nights when the whole world seems to press in on you –– the clouds linger close to the streets, and the air is cold and dense, concealing the covert and the unspeakable. Even the streetlamps seem like pale stars, feebly holding back the darkness and casting shadows on ...

Nuts to You

Melina Hughes

October 3, 2013


Filed under Humor

Dig. Dig dig dig. Run run run run. ACORN. Dig dig run. Climb tree. Climb up. Climb down. Climb up, up, down, up, up, up, down, up, down. Up down. Down down up down. Up down down. Up. Down. Run. French fries? Stare. Fries? Stare. Fries fries. Omnomnomnomnom. Blink. Blink...

Student Just Wants Burger Instead of Quinoa

Student Just Wants Burger Instead of Quinoa

Melina Hughes

September 19, 2013


Filed under Humor

Last Friday, as eager first-year Kip Stevens entered Jewett Dining Hall, he was ecstatic to hear that there were, once again, burgers for lunch. "I really love hamburgers. I, like, could eat like five of them right now," said Stevens. However, excitement soon turned to tragedy when Stevens attempted to ha...

First-Year Roomies Not Best Friends

Rosemary Hanson

September 19, 2013


Filed under Humor

Scandal rocked the quiet little community of Lyman House just outside of Anderson Hall last Friday, Sept. 13. At approximately 7:16 p.m. local time, nearby resident assistants received information of a domestic problem in room 216 of the Tower. Initial reports seem to indicate that first-year reside...

Laywatch

Rosemary Hanson

September 19, 2013


Filed under Humor

Hookups (Boning, Banging and More Boning - the original BBMB): Tom ('17) and Linda ('15): Off-campus house near Safeway Tom ('17) and Amanda ('15): Off-campus house near Safeway Jeff ('15) and himself ('15): Jewett Room 110 James ('17) and Tom ('17): Jewett Room 110, Jewett Room 315, Anders...

What’s in Your Oven?

Evelyn Levine

September 19, 2013


Filed under Humor

Do you sometimes wonder what is in your oven, but are too confused, lazy, tired, dumb or freaked out to check? We can help. Please note, however, that due to the limited nature of the quiz, all items fit for oven-filling cannot be listed. Please accept our sincerest apologies, if we are unable to even...

Lost & Found

Molly Johanson

September 19, 2013


Filed under Humor

Found near the libes: Swipe card in ID card holder attached to Whitman College lanyard. Found in Olin Hall: Nalgene bottle with 15+ stickers on it. Come by Prentiss Room 106 to claim it. If you can name five of the stickers, it's yours. Lost sometime during first year: My desire for brunch. It...

The Lord of the Swings, Feasts Worthy of the Green Dragon, and New Year’s Eve

Lindsey Holdren

April 11, 2013


Filed under I Didn't Bother to Pick My Category

I spent the last day of the old year doing the Shotover Bungee Swing. I jumped from over 300 feet (with a few seconds of free fall) into a canyon. I guess I'm beginning the transformative process of becoming an adrenaline junkie. The chaps who run the Swing are a bunch of wonderfully hilarious hams. ...

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