Whitman Wire

Student in Quandary after Door is Held for Her

Clara Wheeler, Humor Writer

December 8, 2016

Whitman student Jackie Daniels is totally freaking out right now because baseball team beauty Mike Bellafonte held open the door for her on her way to class, even though she was more than thirty feet away and had to walk faster to not make it weird. Sources report that Jackie was found crouched under th...

Fierce Competition Predicted for Oscars

Fierce Competition Predicted for Oscars

Nathan Fisher

February 27, 2014

Move aside "Downton Abbey" and "Good Wife," because the Oscars are on Sunday, March 2. That's right, the golden phallus, the Academy Award of Merit, dubbed the Oscars, will be awarded to the top dogs in the film industry. This year's competition was fierce, and it showcased a plethora of standout movies....

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