Whitman Wire

Horrified Mitch McConnell Wakes Up From Nightmare in which Trump is the GOP Nominee

Jeffrey Gustaveson, staff writer

March 10, 2016

  Washington, D.C. -- Waking in a panicked, cold sweat early Wednesday morning, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell breathed an enormous sigh of relief after reminding himself that his nightmare about Donald Trump winning the GOP nomination was “totally impossible” and “just a dream”...

Bad Biscuits Make The Baker Broke, Bro

Jack Swain, staff writer

March 3, 2016

“Do you know what you are doing after you graduate?” “What are you doing this summer?” “Are you nervous for your orals?” “What’s it like to be queer?” “Did you see the moon last night?” “What do you dream about?” “Do you have siblings?” “What are yo...

Find Pride In Your Guilty Pleasures

Find Pride In Your Guilty Pleasures

Nathan Fisher

October 23, 2013

Admit it: You have at least one secret show you watch when no one is looking.  The show you just can't live without seeing, no matter how stupid, corny or predictable it may be. We all have our little guilty pleasures, but why be ashamed of them? Why not admit and embrace the ugly and horrible tastes th...

Lazy writing leads to forgettable ‘Words’

Lazy writing leads to forgettable ‘Words’

Nathan Fisher

September 13, 2012

After a long week with, go figure, lots of homework, I welcomed the escape to my "job" at the movies. Like last week, none of the options grabbed me, so I succumbed to seeing "The Words," a story-within-a-story, within another story or two. Unfortunately, all the stories sucked. "The Words" opens with Clay Hammond (Dennis Quaid) reading his new book to an adoring audienc...

“Happy Feet Two” fails to find its wings

“Happy Feet Two” fails to find its wings

Nathan Fisher

December 1, 2011

Little baby penguins singing and dancing are only cute for so long. "Happy Feet Two" tries to rekindle the love of the first dancing and singing penguins movie but falls flat like a penguin trying to fly. The main plot of the film follows Mumble (Elijah Wood), now a grown-up, and his son Erik, who, unlike his dad, cannot sing...

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