Things are heating up: the sun is out and the weather is hot, and students are finally able to show off their equally hot, hot bods. While there’s no one style for college students to strive for, and while it’s easy to feel out of place when wearing real dress code in college, it is still likely that professors will grimace when students show up in low cut tank tops and short bodycon skirts in the lab. So how can we transform our hot girl garments into scholarly suits?
Glasses: If you’ve got contacts, wear your high school glasses instead. This will demonstrate that your business here is to learn as well as to look bomb AF, like you’re Elle Woods prancing into Harvard Law school. Don’t have glasses? Just pop out the lens of those 3D glasses you’ve been holding onto since the 3rd grade. No one will tell the difference.
Whitman-endorsed hoeism: Take your Sweet Onion Crank tank top and cut it down to a Hooters’ tank shape. Make your class shirt into a tube top. Your sweatpants into sweatshort-shorts. If you’re promoting the college brand, professors are sure to agree that your luscious look is totally class-appropriate. Like a school uniform.
Academic language: You know those booty shorts that have words like “Spicy” or “All you need is this ass and some grass” imprinted on the back? Online sites provide tools for you. There are sites where you can design your own, choosing the color and slogan that match your individual personality. Order some booty shorts with academic terms from your class displayed across your cheeks! Your professors will appreciate that you’ve been paying attention to their lectures on “neoliberalism” or “Lophotrochozoa”.
All in all, don’t worry about sticking out in class, you can learn and still be wearing a bodysuit! A hottie thottie can still be educated. So dump your boyfriend, grab your tie front tops and textbooks, and get to class! And remember, every body is a hot girl summer body.