If there is one thing that every single human being can agree on, it’s that receiving an unsolicited picture of a man’s penis is by and far the greatest thing ever. These pictures, fondly referred to as “dick pics,” have established millions of romantic relationships and ended exactly zero. In fact, many scientists claim that the abrupt appearance of a meat javelin in one’s view evokes the firing of dopamine neurons in the brain – regardless of the one-eyed monster’s color, size or texture.
With this is mind, it should not come as a surprise that men around the globe have realized the friendship-building potential of an unsolicited dick pic. To many, a Snapchat of your best friend’s unripe bagpipe is enough to shed a tear over.
“What better way to tell my bro that I appreciate his corporeal existence and recognize his significant role in my everyday jubilation?” said one tearful local, photo of his boneless chicken wang in hand.
One man on Facebook even shared his heartwarming account of receiving a dick pic from his father-in-law.
“I’m just so used to my pale, circumcised zipper hugger that when I saw his uncircumcised tan banana I was blown away! It looked like it was wearing a cute little hat! Like one of those old-fashioned sleeping caps but fleshier. Hahahahaha. I laughed for hours, and then told him to go get the growth on his shaft checked out.”
Whether or not this sociopolitical trend will overtake the fourth-wave feminist movement has yet to be determined.