Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Vol. CLIV, Issue 6
Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Whitman news since 1896

Whitman Wire

Meet the latest first-year bands!

Basic CMYK
“We’ve kind of invented a new genre. We call it John Slayer. Its basically like John Mayer if John Mayer played thrash metal. Lots of soulful vocals and sentimental lyrics combined with massive guitar sound, incredibly sick riffs and hard shredding guitar. Our music is pretty much exactly what you should play to impress someone you want to date, as long as that person is a princess trapped in a castle made of fire. Ideally, you should be holding a boombox playing our music outside of her window while dragons fly figure eights above your head and trolls destroy neighbor- ing villages.”

Basic CMYK
“Hey, we’re two MCs from Ballard! We like to lay down tracks about the environmental rights movement and our favorite ethnic foods. Our hit track right now is ‘Coconut Raisin Curry.’ It’s a tribute to Malia Obama. We’re always working on new material, though, so you should totally come see us. Our friend in Anderson made some sweet beats this summer on Garage Band, so we’re probably going to incorporate those into our act. Our live show consists entirely of us doing call and response to the audience. Like, we do this one remix of ‘From the Window to the Wall’ where the beat drops out right when we say ‘to the window’ and we point the mikes at the audience, implying that they should sing that part of the hook. It’s pretty rough right now, but I think we’re going to get it down soon. We’re playing at the TKE house next Wednesday: you should totally come see us!”

Basic CMYK
“Our sound is comparable to early Lucid Dream, if Lucid sounded a little more like Danger Mermaid. We play primarily LD covers, but we’re collaborating right now on some pretty sweet stuff that we hope to showcase later this fall. After an intense meditative period during his senior year at Ballard, our lead guitarist has been polishing some new pieces about love, environmentalism and the unending pain that is human existence. We’re pretty stoked. I totes want to keep it on the DL so I’ll leave you with one word: sitar.”

Basic CMYK
“Picture a cherry blossom falling gently to the ground. Now picture a rabbit hopping up and eating that blossom between two paws. Now picture a hawk falling from the sky, catching that rabbit with its talons and tearing its neck open. That’s our music. We are intensely spiritual and experimental in our process of musical creation, or as we call it, melodic language innovation. I guess if I absolutely had to label us, I’d say we’re like if Death Cab for Cutie had a baby with Stevie Nicks, and then that child went on to have a threesome with Imogen Heap and Fall Out Boy as a Paul Simon album played in the background and Jason Mraz lit vanilla candles to set the mood. We’re like that.”

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